My cousin, who is about as likely to get kicked out of the family as I am for her irreverence, sent me a link to one of the most hilarious tumblr pages ever. I could not stop laughing about this woman’s experiments on her husband.
In fact, the source of this comedy was just too rich: 62 Things to Say to Make Your Husband Feel Great. It was like a little gift from the comedy gods. I couldn’t help myself. I had to perform the experiment myself.
I began texting the suggested statements to Charlie with absolutely no context.
Me: I love it when you wear that.
Charlie: ?? I’m wearing a Millenium Falcon shirt.
Me: I’m praying for you today.
*my phone rings*
Charlie: Are you high?
Me: No. I’m graciously submitting to your gentle leadership as the head of our household.
Charlie: Have you ingested some foreign substance? Like crack?
Me: I’m totally sober. I read a website of 62 things that will make you feel great. How do you feel?
Charlie: Like I’m married to a nut job. Stop it!
Me: I’m having WAY too much fun now.
Charlie: Are you with Erica? Can she drive you home?
But we’re having a really good time. And that makes us both feel great. So there’s that.